This week's Funny Fun Monday is being hosted by Peter, the hostess with the mostess. Holtie's House says this: "I want you to tell us your favorite joke and/or show us your favorite cartoon...Remember it's New Year's Eve and we feel like a good laugh before 2008 comes along and does its thing on us."
Well, I just couldn't end this year with a Fun Monday by following the rules, now could I ? For one thing, I'm not good at telling jokes. I get things out of order, I forget the punch line, and worst of all, I get tickled trying to tell the joke and leave those around me who are listening suffering, wondering what the heck is so funny. For another thing, all my cartoons are at home, and I'm not, and I'm afraid to use one off the Internet, and I don't want to get into trouble by using something that's copyrighted, and I really don't like getting into trouble. (All you grammarticians get out your red marking pencils and tear into that run-on sentence.)
So, my Fun Monday is a request. My New Year's Resolution is to send all of you hand-made bedroom slippers this year. The request: Please send me your shoe size. You'll most likely agree that this is a splendid idea and should you wish to do the same, I have included the instructions below:
How to make bedroom slippers out of Maxi Pads:
1) You will need four Maxi Pads for each pair of slippers.
2) Two of them are laid flat for the bottom of the foot part.
3) The other two wrap around the toe part to form the top part.
4) Tape or glue each side of the top part pieces to the bottom part of the foot part.
5) Decorate the top parts with whatever you desire...silk flowers, valentines, jelly beans...or anything that is aesthetically appealing to the lucky recipient of this gift.
Hint: Do not assemble these on your feet by using a glue gun. The doctor says my blisters will heal in a few days.
These slippers:
1) are soft and hygenic
2) are safe because of the non-slip grip on the soles
3) keep feet fresh-smelling because of the built-in deodorant feature
4) eliminate the need to bend over to mop up spills
5) are disposable and biodegradable (see #6)
6) are environmentally safe (see #5)
7) come in three convenient sizes: light, regular, and get out the sand bags
Since they (whoever they is are) say that a picture is worth a thousand words, here is an illustration to assist you in designing your very own Maxi Pad Slippers.
Even though this is NOT a joke or cartoon, maybe it will at least give you a 2008 giggle or three.
Remember, please let me know your shoe size and also, list any other features you can think of for this delightful footwear.
Hey Swampy, its good to see that you stayed true to your code of "not followin' the rules"
that was hilarious (it was meant to be funny wasn't it?) my slipper size should just about match your Butt size BTW.
Posted by: Peter | December 30, 2007 at 04:51 PM
He,he Swampy. Your slippers are cute and festive.
Posted by: mjd | December 30, 2007 at 05:20 PM
Hey I got lots of those thingys that I have no use for TG! I'll mail them to you.
Posted by: janeywan | December 30, 2007 at 06:07 PM
Why use tape to connect when they come already self adheasived? (and yes, that is a word thankyouverymuch!)
Posted by: nikki | December 30, 2007 at 06:23 PM
I TELL YOU WHAT!...: I don't know what the heck kind of family I married into! I know what I'm getting you for Christmas next year...
Posted by: Nekked Lizard Lady | December 30, 2007 at 07:58 PM
This is strangely similar to the FM I'll be posting shortly...
AND
you're "nested" in my first 50 items of my "100 Things" list...:)
Posted by: Robin (the pensieve one) | December 30, 2007 at 08:59 PM
I love it.. do you think this would be a good craft for my Girl Scout Troop?? I think it would be age appropriate since they are 12/13 year olds!!
Posted by: Alison | December 30, 2007 at 09:00 PM
You are a strange lady....
Posted by: M@ | December 30, 2007 at 09:01 PM
Oh I would love a pair of those! Maybe they would keep my feet dry while walking through snow. They should absorb the melting snow, right? But leave my skin dry. :)
Maybe I'll just make them for my daughter instead. ;)
Posted by: Lisa's Chaos | December 30, 2007 at 09:32 PM
Once again, hysterical! I think red tassles might be nice. But I'm NOT giving you my shoe size!
Posted by: Tiggerlane | December 30, 2007 at 09:34 PM
Aww Swampy! How sweet of you! But you know its rather hot down here at the moment, I think I will stick to my bare feet!
Posted by: Karisma | December 30, 2007 at 10:17 PM
And I suppose they absorb all the perspiration and toe-jam too. Not that I have those things.
Lordy this takes the biscuit, Swampy.
Actually the pads here, the sticky peel-off strip has trivia on it (I did a post on them once, here: http://richardandmelissa.blogspot.com/2007/02/this-ones-for-ladies.html )
So I'm thinking you could incorporate a bit of eddication at the same time, yes??
Posted by: Melissa in NZ | December 31, 2007 at 05:02 AM
Oh see, you sidetracked me totally - I came here to wish you all a happy new year! It's after midnight here and it's 1 January 2008!
Hope you have a brilliant year!
Posted by: Melissa in NZ | December 31, 2007 at 05:03 AM
OMG........these ARE funny. And when you're done with them....don't forget to wrap them up and DON'T FLUSH THEM DOWN THE DRAIN!!!!
- - -
Did you know why the Nativity Scene cannot be displayed in D.C.? Because no one can find 3 wise men OR a virgin!!!!
Mine's posted! Come laugh with me today!!!
Posted by: Hootin' Anni | December 31, 2007 at 05:31 AM
You are hilarious. Great post if there were prizes you'd be a winner. Happy New Year and keep breaking the rules!!
Posted by: chrisb | December 31, 2007 at 06:44 AM
That's a Good One!
Happy New Year!
Posted by: kitten (Katie) | December 31, 2007 at 07:07 AM
That seemed like a joke to me! You know when you wrap the top ones across the foot, the edges look sort of like lace. Fancy! :D
Posted by: Junebug | December 31, 2007 at 07:26 AM
What a hoot! Can you come to our annual girls weekend at the cabin and bring your great crafty ideas with you? I wonder who first thought of that?
LMAO!
Posted by: Caroline | December 31, 2007 at 08:52 AM
I would never have imagined someone could come up with that.
Posted by: RWA | December 31, 2007 at 08:59 AM
Wow. You are quite . . . creative. Not leaving my shoe size, though. ;)
Posted by: kaycie | December 31, 2007 at 09:01 AM
Those are perfect. Maybe if I made those for my kids school craft fair, the organizers would stop asking me to participate! Its worth a shot!
Posted by: Devon | December 31, 2007 at 11:07 AM
and Swampy will be found at the Costco or Sam's Club or whatever y'all have buying the supplies! I would love the see the checkout person...tee hee hee.
Posted by: Sandy | December 31, 2007 at 11:17 AM
Those are hilarious!! Very creative. :)
Posted by: Michelle | December 31, 2007 at 07:36 PM
Those are so funny! You could even wear them out to the grocery store.
Happy New Year to you!
Posted by: rotten correspondent | January 01, 2008 at 09:56 AM
I got an emailed pair of those too and posted just the picture of them in a past post. So Funny! Oh and I forgot on your newest post...
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Posted by: Robinella | January 01, 2008 at 10:01 AM
I'll have to go shopping. Don't have the fixins for those anymore!!
Posted by: Pamela | January 01, 2008 at 06:09 PM