Anecdotes, Antidotes, and Anodes

Pioneer Woman (Ree Drummond)...Move Over for AnodeMan

OK. There's no doubt that Ree Drummond, aka Pioneer Woman, is the newest sensation all over the World ! Maybe on the moon ! Who knows ? Not only does she sound more like Ethel than Ethel, she can belch out a burp that would embarrass a sailor, and discuss calf nuts with grace and style...she can cook circles around Julia Child, Emeril Lagasse, Paula Deen to name just a few.

But wait just a minute ! Hold your horses. There's a new celebrity tettering on the horizon of famedom.  He has spent hours slaving over a hot stove for many years creating masterpiece meals like fried Spam with creamed corn.  He has literally cleaned out the refrigerator and salvaged everything in it by dipping  it contents from carrots to scallops to unidentifiable objects into tempura batter and them submerging them into a Fry Daddy full of hot grease.

Yes. There's no doubt about it. AnodeMan is on the brink of being discovered.

 

If you're interested in AnodeMan's recipe for Bacon Grease Gravy, please let me know.  I'll share it on a future post.

Until then, be sure to tune in to The Bonnie Hunt Show on Wednesday, November 25 to watch Ree cook with whiskey. 

Daddy's on the Computer

 

 

When a nineteen-month old baby grabs your finger and leads your to the computer screen saying, "See Daddy See Daddy," it tugs at a Gammy's heart strings almost too hard.

This one will tug a little, too !
 

 

Char-wee !

Caption Char-wee's Photos:

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Birthday Mug Shots

Just a few of the faces from Weesey Cup and Hair-wee's birthday bash this weekend:

 

Why Do Baseball Players Spit SO MUCH ?

Now that the World Series has ended, once again withdrawal has set in.  Anytime a sporting event that lasts for an extended period of time ends, such as Wimbledon, The Olympics, football season, or a PGA golf tournament, (I'd rather watch paint dry) I go into a funk-of-sorts.

Was it just me, or did the players spit more this series than any other ? Seems as though I spent more time counting the players hawking loogies than watching the actual game. 

It became apparent there were many expectorating styles.  Some players were proficient in blowing spit through their teeth.  Others fashioned their lips in an "O" and blew their spit into circular motions through the air. For those on the bench, the spit seemed to be sent down to the ground between the legs rather than through the fence.

Why do baseball players spit so much ? I can't remember ever seeing Roger Federer or Maria Sharapova coating the tennis court with spit.  Or, Tiger Woods sending it sailing before he tees off or makes a putt.  What about hockey players ? Would their spit freeze on the ice ?  About the only thing I've ever seen hockey players spit is their teeth.

When tobacco chewing was in vogue, there was no question as to why they spit. Swallowing tobacco juice might cause a bit of indigestion, and possibly rid the body of worms.

Now that we all know about the chance of tobacco usage causing cancer, many players wanting to avoid that and be role models, gave up tobacco for sunflower seeds.  But as far as I could tell, very few of the players had sunflower-seed-hull-filled-spit.  Most of the spit just looked like plain 'ole spit.  Although the consistency did vary.

Then I wonder, what position spits the most . Obviously, the catcher would have to be quite talented to get a wad of spit out from behind his mask. Because the cameras generally focus on the batter, or the batter on deck, their flying globs are captured more than any others.  The pitcher also does his part to keep the mound moistened.  We won't even mention the coaches and managers.

Wonder if they've ever thought about how much spit there is when sliding into home plate ?

I did notice that A-Rod sent his flying in different directions...even on his uniform. Hopefully, Kate will help him become less messy with his technique.

Chase Utley always had a little spittle attached to that growth of hair under his bottom lip.

Then there's Robinson Cano who always seemed to have a big pink bubble covering most of his face.

As far as Derek Jeter is concerned, I'm not even sure he ever spit because my focus was on those blue eyes.

The HPA (Health Protection Agency) has cautioned that spitting could increase the risk of spreading H1N1.  If this is true, both stadiums should have been quarantined.

Have you ever tried to spit that much ?  If you haven't, may I suggest that you try.  It's almost impossible to produce that much spit, even with a cold or sinus infection, where snot is involved.

Maybe next year I'll give up my obsession with counting spits and focus on adjustments.

Things That Make You Go Hmmmm....Continued

For those of you who recognized the doll in the previous post, yes, you are old ! She was my Christmas gift one year, and I don't remember how old I was...maybe fifteen or sixteen. I fell in love with a friend's bride doll while visiting my Aunt Lou Jean in Hugo, Oklahoma, and we would play together. 

My parents realized how very much I loved that doll. Never dreaming of having one of my own because she probably cost millions of dollars, so I didn't dare ask for one.  Well, maybe it was mentioned a couple of times. I did, however, ask many times to go visit my aunt, and then hope that Jim, yes Jim, would let me play with his bride doll.  Jim never figured out why his mom felt he should have a bride doll, but he was more than happy to let me play with her while he worked on his go-cart.

Jim and I have shared many laughs the last couple of months when I reminded him at our 40th high school reunion I remembered his bride doll. I also told  him I'd think about not telling anyone... I think his bride doll had black hair.

 

Things That Make You Go Hmmmm....

Bob Dylan's 'Christmas in the Heart'

Please let me preface this with how nice it is that the proceeds from Bob Dylan's new CD, "Christmas in the Heart," go to the charity, Feeding America.  Next, I need to say how much I love these songs: "Blowin' in the Wind," "The Times They Are A Changin'," "It Ain't Me Babe," "Like a Rolling Stone," "Mr. Tambourine Man," and one of my all time favorites, "Just Like a Woman."  So, I don't want anyone walking away today thinking this was a Bob Dylan bashing.

He is a wonderful lyricist, but  Dylan sings as though he's just swallowed a wheelbarrow full of rocks, but on this album, he must have swallowed the wheelbarrow. 

This is the time of year the old Christmas tunes start playing at our house. YUP. Even a few weeks before Thanksgiving, the urge hits me to fill the air with my favorite kind of music. YUP. By the time Christmas rolls through, I'm sick of it.YUP ! Sick. Of. It.

So, it is with great anticipation to find out what new 'albums' will be released for the coming holiday season.  This one tickled my curiosity, so I took a listen. O!H!!M!Y!G!O!!O!D!N!E!S!S! This is not a Frank Sinatra or a Dean Martin crooning about a White Christmas. It's more like a Bob Dylan croaking Do You Hear What I Hear. . . and me thinking 'not if I can get this volume turned down.'

Little Drummer Boy is one of  my childhood favorites that conjures up some happy memories, but listening to this version makes me want to take a drum stick and poke it in my ear.

The more I listened, the more I laughed. It's so entertaining just visualizing Dylan recording these classics.

It also reminded me of last year when my four-year-old granddaughter, Little Miss P, was sitting in my lap at the piano. I was clunking at the keys and we were "singing" together. Finally, she looked up at me with those gorgeous, innocent, brown eyes and simply stated, "Gammy, stop singing. You're scaring my ears."

In the words of a truthful four-year-old, "Bob, stop singing. You're scaring my ears."

Clink the link to listen to "Christmas in the Heart."

iPhone Photographs

It would be an understatement to say that AnodeMan is in love with his iPhone. He was standing in line the first day they went on the sale. He submitted his order early for the 2G, and because he's now such a valued customer, I think Apple just mailed him the 3G.

Surprisingly enough, he learned to use it ! This is contrary to any piece of electronics he has ever encountered.  I mean, he doesn't even know how to use the TV remote.  Well, that's not exactly true, but just punching buttons until something happens is not my idea of knowing how to use the thing.  Some of you may remember a couple of posts a year or so ago about his relationship with the lady in his GPS.  That hasn't changed much. He is still arguing with her. Because he just recently started e-mailing as a way to communicate, it was quite a shock to start receiving test messages, e-mails, and videos from him. Not to mention that he downloaded 1,000's of songs which subsequently crashed not only his iPhone, but also his MAC. 

That leads to this conversation:

From his iPhone, he calls...

Him:  Are you going to be running errands today?

Me: Why ?

Him: I need you to run an errand for me.

Me: Where ?

Him: Just to City Market.

Me: For what ?

Him: To pick up some pictures I had developed.

Me: OK.

 

In case you're thinking that I just rearranged those pictures to look like there were two full boxes, I didn't.

Conversation continues once I used a fork lift to get these into the house:

Him: That's not all of the pictures.

Me: What the heck do you mean THAT'S NOT ALL ?!?

Him: I just realized that the thumb drive I used didn't hold all the pictures that were on my iPhone.

Me: You took ALL those pictures with your iPhone ?

Him: Uh-huh.

Me:  So how many more pictures are there?

Him: About three months worth.

Me: Where are you going?

Him: To learn more about the 85,000 applications for my iPhone.

Me:  (______________________________) You can fill in the blank.

Bank of Colorado...Get Your Free Haircuts Here !

Even though October, Breast Cancer Awareness month is behind us, many have a long road ahead of them fighting for their lives.  By the time you finish reading this post, about  six women and possibly  a man will have been diagnosed with Breast Cancer. Approximately one will have died !

It is with great passion that this post has been created.  When most of us walk into our banks, we see a staff of people doing their jobs at their desks or at teller counters or at other places within that building.

We probably never realize there are some banks where employees step out of the realm of cashing checks and making loans to reach out to help those who cannot afford a mammogram.

 

The Patterson Branch of the Bank of Colorado is one of those banks. The officers and employees there have been participating in a Breast Cancer Fundraiser for the last several years by first making and selling ribbons in the bank lobbies, and later, holding bake sales and chili cook-offs. There was even a Dueling Piano Show at the Mesa Theatre. The evening was a great success ! The place sold out !

Long-haired-Buffalo-Bill-looking-vice-president, Steve Love, came to realize that here in a pretty conservative Grand Junction, many his age and even younger found his 60's, the 1860's, hairstyle  shall we say..."unacceptable."  He happened on a "brilliant idea" that he would get his hair cut if his critic d'jours would make a donation of maybe $5,000 to the charity of their choice.

These conversations continued here and there but always moved to other topics.  One such discussion, fueled by a holiday party and a keg of beer, was overheard by co-worker and marketing guru, Amanda Singer.  She had been active in Breast Cancer Awareness for years and sensed a marketing opportunity.  He made a deal, continued to grow the hair, and let Amanda do the work.

Amanda says of Steve, "Being the 'ole cowboy type, I knew Steve wouldn't go back on a handshake, no matter how many drinks were involved.  I started plotting and planning how we could raise $20,000 in just a month. The deal was pretty simple: $5,000 and Steve would get what I call a gentleman's haircut, $10,000 a haircut AND the beard had to go, $20,000 he would shave his head and face!"

Steve's wife, Sue, will tell you that he was never a "long hair" in college. His parents made it pretty clear that they were paying the bills, and that they did have "standards."  He marveled at what The Man (coaches, bosses, and those people who like to mind everybody else's business) found "too long" by hair standards.  Steve says, "So, I've been getting 'attention' for years."

Steve explains that his sons have grown their hair long on occasion, generating some interesting extended family discussions, but they were always encouraged to be individuals. He goes on to say that both of them sport short hair cuts these days.

He has several explanations for his long hair...while coaching his son's soccer team for six years, he grew his hair even longer, ignoring his critics with the excuse, "I'm just trying to relate to the kids."  Another is that his barber shop closed.  One explanation grabs at my heart strings...his marvelous co-worker went through an extended battle with cancer.  Steve says, "She lost that battle, but my hair became a little tribute to her."

But, Amanda's scheming and plotting and planning didn't just involve Steve.

Enter Amanda's brother, Justin McCain. Being a framer, working in the hot sun, Justin wanted to shave his head back in May prior to the summer temperatures here but decided he would also love to participate in the fundraiser by donating his ponytail for this worthwhile cause.

 

Both gentlemen were seated and appeared a wee bit bit fidgety as Santa, and Dee from MJM Institute of  Cosmetology prepare them for a shearing.

 

Just a few of young ladies from MJM who came to learn the skills of whacking off a ponytail...or two.

 

The eyes say it all...With one quick swoop of Dee's clippers, Steve's ponytail has been separated from his head, where it has been located for many, many years.

Justin just closes his eyes as Santa and Steve witness the ponytail removal. Let's just hope that Dee's eyes aren't closed.

 

Don't purse those lips too much. Dee seems a little clipper-happy judging by that smile on her face, and the beard might not be the only thing missing from your face.

 

Have I mentioned that Dee is clipper happy ? She and her buzz saw have moved over to Justin's head, and Shelby has now stepped in to work her magic on Steve.

What ear ?
 

Bank of Colorado President, Chris Launer, seems to have elicited some kind of painful response from Steve. Surely,it's not the haircut that hurts.

 

Evidently, judging by the look on Steve's face, not only is it painful, it's very, very scary !
 

 

Not to worry, Steve, there's plenty of cake to make it all better !

One for you and one for Chris.

 

Steve's sister and brother-in-law, Carolyn and Gene Lenderman, came to share in the fun and festivities.

 

Now wonder who could be sporting this hip-hair-style ?

 

It appears that Justin knows this lady.

Ah-Ha!  Alice Lucas is the proud Grandmother of Justin and Amanda who were an integral part of this successful Breast Cancer Fundraiser.

 

And just how successful ?  Chris presents Penny Cowden, executive director of St. Mary's Hospital Foundation this large check.

Penny poses with Robert Bray, of Bray Real Estate, who has served on the Board of Directors at St. Mary's Hospital.

Still can't read how much the check is for?

Don't worry about the spelling, it's the numbers that count !

$11,009.49 !

ELEVEN THOUSAND, NINE DOLLARS, and FORTY-NINE CENTS.

This money will be donated to the Wilma B. Bacon Mammography Center supporting the Butterfly Fundraiser. The Butterfly Fundraiser helps uninsured and under-insured women in Mesa County receive mammograms.

And what about the ponytails ?  They will be donated to Pantene Beautiful Lengths.

The rest of these curly locks were swept up and tossed.

Justin's New Look

 

Steve's New Look  (Nice shirt...gotta love that logo !)

Thanks to everyone who made this event happen and to all those who donated money to the Butterfly Fundraiser. 

If you want to be a part of this, contact Amanda Singer at The Bank of Colorado in Grand Junction.
970-245-1600

But, don't get too close to her. You may end up in The Bank of Colorado Barber Shop receiving a free haircut.

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Early detection saves lives. Know the facts !

To those who are here for the first time, "Welcome." All words in color are links that will take you to various websites. Be sure to click on "comments" to read what others have to say or better yet, leave your own.  Ya'll come back now.)

VAQ-140 Patriots

It's always a good time when the Prowler Boys from VAQ-140 stop by.  AnodeMan and I enjoyed re-told stories about O-Face, Country Jam, Critters (literally and figuratively), Rabies Medal Ceremonies, and on and on. Just an evening full of fun and laughter meeting new friends and reminiscing with "old" friends like Topper, Crash, and Roto.  (Be sure to "clink the link" and check out some pretty amazing photos on their site.)

It's also an opportunity for us to let them know how much we appreciate their dedication to our country...and especially to express our thanks to their families...the wives who are at home with the children...the wives who are at home expecting new babies...

 

Someday I'll have a stronger flash for shots like this one.

 

 

If you think you've seen some of these faces before, well, you're correct.  We were lucky enough to host Crash, Roto, and Wipes for several days last summer.  This post and this post might jog your memory. 

Wait a minute. Wipes ? Where's Wipes ?  At least his duffel bag made it to NAS-GJT.  Wipes, just do as I do on a trip...go shopping and buy some new clothes, and maybe some two-ply tissue paper.

Have a productive time in Norfolk and FLY SAFE.

Boxer Mania

A typical day in the lives of June Bug, Lola, and Ginger.  Feel free to caption any or all:

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"In a perfect world, every dog would have a home and every home would have a dog."

My Birthday Suit...Mon Funday Continued

Because there wasn't enough time to truthfully post about yesterday's Mon Funday question, I took the easy way out and just said I wake up in my birthday suit.  That's not exactly true, but because I always follow rules to a "T," that was the best I could do. LIE !

Today, I decided to share pictures. Gasp. Gasp.

No, not my birthday suit ! I take my shower with clothes on !

The main article of clothing that is usually on my body is a pair of socks. My feet are always cold, and HansMan does NOT like them to get anywhere close to him. I'm not talking just plain old cold. I'm talking I-I-I-C-C-C-E-E-E COLD !

Instead of just taking a boring picture of my socks, I thought it would be more interesting to have them on, but there was no one to take the picture.  Where's my tripod?  This is just too much work.

At this point, I'm tired of explaining.  See, it's more trouble to lie than it is to tell the truth.  Here's the best I could do.

 

While my camera's timer was ticking away, June Bug, Lola, and Ginger insisted on being in the picture. There are socks on my feet, they just don't show up.  But at least you can see  that I wear boxers...get it ?  Boxers ! As in boxer shorts ? 

Next try.  See. There's a little glimpse of my socks.  It's important that my socks are in keeping with the current holiday or season.

Lola insisted on posing her socks, too.

Well, that's it. The most important article of clothing in my sleepwear wardrobe is my socks...are my socks?  IS !  ...article is...

Forget it. That's the best I can do for a post today. And that's the truth.

My Birthday Suit

Mondays seem to be rolling around too quickly these days. Gattina who has Writer Cramps, is our hostess for Mon Funday. (Clink the link for the players.)

Her question is: What are you wearing when you get out of your bed on a Sunday morning. Of course I want to see a picture of what you wear, with you inside or not.

This will probably be my shortest post of all time.

What am I wearing ? NUTHIN' !  There will be no pictures today.  TMI ?